Anonymous Posts

PS: never leave an anonymous post on here. It confuses and frustrates me, especially like the one left on my last post. It was very insightful and solid, but I have no idea who it is who posted it. Come on! So, if you were the anonymous poster... ...let me know it was you.

Christmas time

My Christmas vacation was a good one. I can't begin to say how good it was to again have my sister back and without ten thousand things going on so that she could actually talk to me again. I got back home on wednesday night and i think that she and i stayed up till1am catching up on the past 2 months worth of both of our lives. It was a long time coming and very much needed. It was tough to leave at the end knowing that she's going to be just as busy this coming semester and it's likely that we will probably go through the same sort of very sparse contact for such a long period of time. Hopefully the Christmas time was enough to carry through though. She's going to India on a lighthouse trip over J-Term and I'm pretty excited about it. Lighthouse was such an experience all of it's own for me and I hope that she will have the same sorts of experiences as well. She's talked about staying with me in Indy for J-Term break, so that would be a good time to get to hear all the stories and see all the pictures.

The four of us decided to do Christmas on Christmas Eve, which was a nice little change. I was pretty excited to give the gifts i'd gotten for mom and dad. I felt pretty good about this being the first year in quite a few that I didn't do all my shopping the day before and have to scramble and guess and what would be nice to give them and stuff. It always came out a bit on the impersonal side of things. This year, however, I've known what I was going to get them as soon as december rolled around. I was most excited about giving mom a little personalized coaster set that you can put pictures in, so I took pictures of all four of us and cut them to size and fit them in. She really liked them, and I was happy about the most creative gift I've made in a while. Though I looked for 3 weeks for a gift or two to get Tracy, i came up empty and was relegated to the cheesy movies and hand lotion stuff 2 days before. And because of that shopping 2 days before christmas I reaffirmed my loathing of all things Wal-Mart. Controlled chaos. Nothing else. I could have punched someone in that place i think.

Angela got her gift that I sent her. I thought it was a pretty good gift considering where everything is with that. I got a nice three picture frame and put some pictures from the weekend she was down decorating at the apartment in there. I was a little dissapointed that she didn't call, but wrote an email instead, but she's been working lots of hours over the holiday, so I've had to remind myself that not hearing from her or being able to get ahold of her very easily is not because she's trying to avoid me. I'm going up there for new years. I'm stoked. I decided the other day that we're having a big talk sometime during the night. (any guesses on how many times i'll put my foot in my mouth for that one?)

My dad and I got into a bit of an arguement sunday night that really lit me up. I mean I was pissed! And I remember sitting in my room and thinking, wow, if I decided I was offended enough about it, i could pack all my junk up right now and leave for indy. It would have cut short the family time by a day. I didn't cause I dont think that it was at all necessary and everything blew over like no big deal. However, I couldn't stop thinking about that for the next 2 days. Never before have I had that as a legitimate possibility. It scared the crap out of me and I began to realize how easy it is for families to turn into such wrecks. I was pretty depressed about that realization for a good solid 48 hours. It's much easier for families to be functional when everyone lives under the same roof. As soon as people live in different houses and different states it can get dicy. It gives people a way out... an oportunity to run away instead of deal with the problem or situation. It would not be hard to cause a whole slew of jumped conclusions and assumptions about what everyone is thinking and what everyone is feeling also. Then time passes, and then telephone calls attempt to mend bridges and that's so impersonal and allows everyone to downplay things that maybe shouldn't be downplayed and maybe should be dealt with thoroughly. From here on out it will be a much more intentional thing on all our parts to keep our family as functional as it has been all my life thus far. This isn't because of any one person, but more about a change in individual people's circumstance. I hope I don't forget about that. Everyone's going to hurt and get hurt; offend and be offended. It's just the reality of life and relationship. The real question is whether we all can remind ourselves in timely ways what the implications of our words and actions could be and whether those are really justified given whatever situation has just occured. I love my family with all that I am and I hope that I dont ever cause the cohesiveness with which we function to be shaken.

The boss is gone on vacation this week. My roommate is gone on vacation this week. Work is so slow that we dont have to bring people in today or tomorrow. I'm more than a little bored. I'm more than a little lonely. The truck driver that just picked stuff up from the warehouse a few hours ago was the only person I may speak to face to face for about a 36 hour period. WHOA. I hope people call me on the phone or something, cause otherwise I might go insane. Good news though... Phil's coming back tomorrow night and bringing Ben & April. Good news #2... Saturday I get to go see Angela again.... BOOYEAH!

tug-o-war

So, there have been a few times in the last 2 months when i've found myself sort of frustrated. No real object of the frustration. I guess maybe frustration at the realities of the situation i find myself in with this girl. I mean, if I was at Taylor and we had been doing this crazy dance toward starting a relationship, things would be a little different. The biggest difference would be the level of intimate, personal knowledge of one another. There would have been about a million coffee dates and all the random run-in's as well as im sure 10 big depressing emails from me (I've managed to keep it down to one this time). I guess what I'm trying to say is that there is a small tug-o-war in me. On the one hand, I know that emotionally, I am very attached to this person. Everything about getting to talk to her or be with her makes my days that much better. In my heart, I think I am ready to start talking 'relationship'. On the other hand, mentally, I remind myself that, even after doing things for 2 months I know about as much intimate, personal detail about her as I have gotten in 2 or 3 conversations with other people. And I ask myself what the heck im thinking about relationships if I dont even know her that personally compared to other girls i've known only to have those fail later on down the road. That's the tension. I've gone back and foreth on this on for about a week. Here are a couple of realizations. I cannot think about how me doing this now compares to me doing this at taylor would match up, cause the situations are simply too different. The number of encounters doesn't work becuase i could have gotten together a million times with her and still been balking at my friends who would try to call it a date. These are real dates. These are intetional things with very intentional reasons. Her agreeing to go on a date with me now is telling me about a Shakesperian sonnet's worth of information compared to what getting together for coffee at Taylor would have told me. anyone can sit down for coffee with anyone at taylor and it still be safe to make whatever you will out of it. Not so for agreeing to go to indy with someone who doesn't even go to school anymore. I need to give that more pull in this little tension of mine than i allow it. Here's another thing... When I was at school everything about 'relationships' hinged around time and knowledge. Do I know her with little to no depth yet to be charted? Have we spent enough time to constitute knowing each other well enough to make such a committment as 'dating'. Here's where i'm beginning to realize that school was this situation unique to itself in all the rest of life's experiences. I was allowed to assess things with that criteria in mind because I had both the time to do such things, as well as a setting which was conducive to engaging that to it's fullest potential. To not know a girl with such depth or to not have spent a million hours of face time together was probably a pretty valid red-flag to waive at potential relationship because in such a situation as college, there's absolutely no reason you don't take full advantage of that and get to that place. The changed situation is this... No longer am i able to pick up the phone and convince her to meet me at the union where we can talk all night and, at worst, maybe oversleep a class or not spend enough time on a paper that will get maybe a little lower letter grade that wont really affect the class grade too drastically, let alone your GPA or whatever. Who cares? Now to pick up the phone to do that means getting in the car, driving an hour, sitting and talking all night, driving back and jumping in the shower for work cause the day begins at 545 and if you dont have enough physical energy to stay on your feet and stay focused, bosses are going to get pretty pissed cause you're gonna do something wrong. Not to say that I probably wont do this from time to time (cause it's me and those are the sorts of things i do cause they are both necessary and worthwhile), but I'm not able to do this with a 10th the frequency as I would be able to at school. All that to say, i am working on being ok with not having had a million hours of contact before i seriously contemplate dating this girl. Cause I think I really do want to date her. No, I'm convinced that I want to date her. And as I try to think and feel and process that through I realize that it's not the same rational, linear reason that I've come to that point in the past. Because of the distance. Becaue of the inability to insatiate her with coffee until she tells me everything there is to know. Becuase of the other things I would use to process, I think i've found myself, maybe for the first time, allowing my emotions to play out more wholely. Emotionally, I have decided that I know her enough to be a part of her life. Emotionally, I feel like there's enough connection to constitute relationship. Emotionally, this all seems to line up wonderfully for me, it's just that the emotional is so not my forte that it's caused a bit of internal tension. This realization takes me far, because i'm ready to say 'screw-it' and throw inhibitions and aprehensions out the window and just go with the emotions on this one. Dating could be this wonderful, beautiful process of her becoming more and more comfortable with me, and me becoming more and more personally aware of who she is. I like that idea and I'm going to fight hard in my head to not let all of my mental criteria for certain levels of knowledge and time be satisfied before I open myself up to where I feel I already am on an emotional level. I may not know her as well as I know others yet, but I know her enough to know that she is worth following my emotional self for once.

Too much to update

So, i've waited too long to do justice to each date and get-together justice as I have in the previous ones... So, here's the overview.
The date at our apartment went spectacular. She and her roommate we me and my roommate's dates for the day. We went to Noblesville and cut down a christmas tree (she held onto my arm there). We brought it back and set it up. Then we made citrus pasta (it went over well. I didn't eat too much, but enough not to get noticed). Then we turned on the christmas music and decorated the apartment. (decorating a christmas tree with a date... really good). We watched 'Love Actually' (she liked it. That was good. We sat by each other, but there was quite a bit of space between us). All in all, the date was spectacular. She seemed so much more comfortable with me and the time was really enjoyable. Phil was an excellent friend cause he made sure that the whole day went well for me. Good friend, good friend.

There have been several other things that have gone on. That next monday was Penthouse Christmas openhouse, which we went to see, and I went over to see her, then she came over to let me walk her through the openhouse. Then afterwards I walked her back to her dorm in the snow. Again, just something that made me feel like she was getting more comfortable with me. Then that thursday night I was driving home (cause friday i had off and my parents and i were going to chicago). Well, it was actually sort of like a blizzard outside, but i decided to drive to taylor to see her and then drive the rest of the way home the next morning. It was a pretty dumb decision to get on the roads, but when i got together with her it was totally worth it. Then sunday on my way back to indy from chicago i stopped by again for coffee. This weekend we had a wedding to go to (Disko and Joy). It was in a northern suburb of chicago. Actually, it was only an hour away from where she lives. I drove up saturday morning to take her out to breakfast. She introduced me to her parents. That went really well cause at least now they can put a face with a name and i feel like that gives them only a little less reason that their daughter is dating some strange crazy person. Finally, I will be going up there to visit her for New Years. I'm looking pretty foreward to that, but at the same time i'm a little anxious about it. Phil and Noah were talking to me this weekend and got me thinking pretty deeply about some stuff and I'm not sure how Im' gonna take that on. Oh, and I forgot to say that I got her a Christmas present! Yeah! a big 3 picture frame from pottery barn and i put 3 pictures from the weekend she was down helping decorate for christmas. I hope she gets it before christmas.

So, yeah, there's been alot. Things have been progressing pretty steadily. I love talking to her and I love thinking about her. I got to the point today where it was hard to not pick up the phone and call her just to talk about nothing. I'll expound on all these thoughts and feelings later (im heading home tomorrow night for a 5 day weekend).

sick to my stomach

So, the last 2 days have pretty much sucked. We were cleaning the apartment from top to bottom on thursday night when it hit... ...hard. I got that sick-to-my-stomach feel again. The same one that hit me about half an hour till date time last time. So, Phil will tell you that i've been a real fun person to be around for the back half of the week. I've been nervous and not feeling very well. I dont know how to explain this at all and it's sort of disconcerting. To make matters worse, at work, i was out in the warehouse shrinkwrapping books all day. This is phenomenally monotonous and as the hours passed by I sank deep into thought and found myself almost trapped in my own head. My thoughts consumed me. Just couldn't get myself to stop running through my head these little movie reels of the upcoming date and how it was going to go so bad and how I was going to be such an idiot and a schmuck. It wasn't the same movie reel over and over, but different potential scenarios where I say stupid things or do stupid things or don't do anything at all. It's really ridiculous and horrible, and I can tell myself that, but at the moments when i was at work stuck in my head there was just no way out and the days passed very excruciatingly. I haven't really eaten anything of any consequence. I at half a sandwich yesterday for lunch. And some chicken late last night. That's about it since thursday afternoon. We're making a big dinner tonite for them. Citrus pasta. I hope that im feeling well enough to eat enough to not have her notice again like last time.... that was so awkward. Ahhh... this is so stupid and i dont know why i can't just make myself stop this ridiculousness.

Anyway, in 2 hours she'll be down here. I called her this morning and i think i woke her up but she seemed kinda happy to talk to me. She's bringing Christmas music to listen to for the day. We're going to go cut down a tree, bring it back here, decorate the apartment, make dinner, and watch a movie. Here's hoping that the movie reels in my head where as ridiculous as everyone keeps telling me.

Czech & David Mauldin

I've been thinking about the Czech alot today. Good, but sullen. I think it's because I was listening to Coldplay and there are certain songs that make me think of those people. Somehow the two integrate well. Today Indy and Prague are experiencing about the same weather. cold. it's hovering around 30 and feels colder (i checked it on weather.com). Will I ever end up back there? I've gotten some correspondence from David Mauldin recently. He's in Taiwan & wrestling with God. Having a hard time with life. I wonder if I would experience the same sort of struggle if I'd ended up moving to Czech and working there as I'd planned to once upon a time. I think I most likely would have. It's so easy to feel alone. And the loneliness can be like quicksand at times. Try to alleviate it, but the attempts remind you all the more of your real loneliness, so you try harder and the feelings grow all the more intense... It would not be difficult to allow yourself to be swallowed up in it.

The Czech Republic is a wonderful place (as are all places on this earth in their own way, im sure) and it's people are particularly beautiful to me (and that's simply because it's about the only other culture that i've gotten to experience with any sort of reality other than my own). I love to think back on them and remember. Remembering invovles recalling their depression; personally, spiritually, and economically. The country is becoming westernized which is good for their economy, but politically and socially they are so stratified that the new economic rewards are really only rewarding a handful of people at the top with little trickle-down effect, especially outside of Prague... The people feel like they've been so whore'd by those in power across much of history... Catholicism tore them apart. Fascim oppressed them. Communism ruined them. Now Capitalism will attempt to strip them. It is no wonder that these people are not interested in anything anyone new says or brings their way. They've all claimed to have answers and solutions and avenues to better life. None of them have followed through on those claims. None of them were really coming from a perspective that had those people as their motivation. As a people they must identify strongly with Hosea in the Bible. Continually betrayed and lied to. And to take back his wife only to know full well that this time was no more real or sincere than any of the times previous.

That's why I would consider being there long term... because the only way I would dream of asking someone to listen to my account of faith and belief in God would be through time and friendship. No tracts. No alter calls. No television preachers. No standing on the street corner with a microphone and shouting that everyone was going to go to Hell. That's not how Czech people work, and for good reason. You think you, a little 17 year old kid over here for a week long ministry trip, have something to tell me in such a way that im' going to throw off 300 years of disappointment and let-downs and let you get me all emotional and grab onto another hope on a whim? Get over yourself. You couldn't even point me to a real church within 30 miles. There is part of me that hates the fact that Americans are so open to such retarded things. I think it points to how safe and sheltered we really are, and I'm not talking about only the upper-middle class afluenza.. I'm talking about most everyone in this country, rich or poor... we're all so easily deceived; so willing to jump over a cliff without thinking and not dealing with the consequences till much later. I think that's why American Christians, on the whole, are pretty ridiculous; we dont have a real faith. We've not made a real choice. We've simply incorporated certain daily and weekly practices and observances that make us feel better and a little validated. They're certainly not real choices or beliefs because our lives wouldn't even be a shadow of what they really are if that was the case. But we live in a culture that promotes that sort of half-hearted, not logical, don't worry about the implications, im not gonna hold you accountable, just say something that sounds nice, isn't it great that we all have 'hope' sort of living and decision making. This is a luxury that someone in Czech does not have. I would take the decision of one Czech person to hold water over 20 Americans on account of I KNOW that the Czech person has had to think it all through because noone's gonna understand what they're doing or thinking and it's certainly not going to make any friends and there's really not going to be any support for them. They've HAD to think it through before doing something that social stupid. The Americans on the other hand... well, I could choose to be a Christian, Catholic, Buddhist, Atheist, Taoist, or Confucianist and I'm praised and respected for 'having conviction' and 'living with purpose'. It's not that hard for me to change my mind and change my mind to whatever direction the wind blows....

I've gotten on a bit of a soapbox and very unintentionally so. This was all supposed to be about Czech and how I thought about it today which was good, and also somewhat depressing. Somehow in my head i convince myself that allowing the experience of individuals over there to weigh heavy on my heart and mind makes it somewhat lighter for them to carry over there... ...even though I cant see them, or talk to them or cry with them anymore. Funny things my mind allows me to do.

Be changeable, Let go of resentment, Don't let your past define you

I'm home. The turkey's been eaten (well, at least the first of several times, no doubt). And I'm contemplating a good long nap on the couch. Thanksgiving's been good to me again. It's the first one without Tracy though, which is different. Not necessarily in a bad or good way, just that she's evidently not here. It's good to be with my parents though and I think we've got a good enjoyable weekend planned.

So, the second date. I know I've waited too long to sit down and write this all out. Cause, the more time passes, the more people ask me about it in person and the more often I tell the story, the more details I leave out I think. I'll try to be thorough though.

Saturday I picked her up at the dorm at around 1 and we headed down to Indy. Broadripple first, and The Monon Coffee Co. She let me suggest a new coffee drink for her and so I was very happy to get her a machiatto (as in a real one, not that starbucks crap). We sat and talked there for a while. It surprised me how comfortable she felt with me, and I'll comment on that at several points in the retelling here... After we were done we walked around a few of the little shops in the area. After we'd been there a couple hours we headed downtown to walk Circle Center Mall. We didn't talk a ton, but it was strangely comfortable to just walk around a crowded mall with her. As we began to get hungry I told her she had to pick where. It got narrowed down to PF Changs and Bucca de Beppos. When chang's had a line a mile long, Bucca's won by default. I think she liked the food. I forgot to say that about 10 minutes before the date began I was sitting in justin Thomas room and got so nervous about the date that I felt a little sick to my stomach. This persisted throughout the evening, not enough to ruin the moments, but enough to know that it was there. I interject this here because we were finished with dinner and the waiter asked if we wanted it boxed up and I said yes. She looked at me and asked if I was feeling ok. It caught me off guard and I said yes, why would you ask that. She pointed out that I'd barely eaten anything. I wasn't thinking about it at the time, but I really had just picked at it cause I don't think my stomach could have handled it. I probably should have just let her know that I was a little nervous and it was bothering my stomach, but I made up some lame excuse about being full or whatever. I think it was just mumbles. Anyway, we walked out of Bucca's and started walking and she wanted to know what was next so I told her that there were 3 options I'd thought of. 1: go to the chocolate cafe on the circle 2: go to the cool boarders store down the road 3: walk the canal. I said we could do as many or as few as she felt like considering it was into the evening now and it was a little chilly out. She decided on boarders and then wanted to go to the canal ( I felt pretty good about that last one cause that's really more of a 'date' thing to do, you know, walk the canal... So I figured she couldn't have been having too horrible of a time.) We went to the Boarders and walked around a bit. Earlier in the day she'd told me about a poetry class that she was in and so I found my favorite poetry book The Prophet by Khalil Gibhran. I read her a few poems that I liked and maybe that sounds like about the cheesiest thing you could do on a second date but I loved it. Who knows if she was thinking that or not, but every time I looked at her she smiled and seemed to be genuinely taking in the moment. Moment... yeah, when i was in it I recognized that it was definitely going to turn into one of those movie moments in my memory. When we were done with Boarders we headed to the canal. I'd never been there before but I was very pleasantly surpised at what a great spot it was. We started walking and started in on the most important dialogue of this whole little adventure of the past few months. Walked all the way to the end at 10th st. and turned back and walked to the beginning again. It was a long time, it was dark, it was cold, we were pretty much alone, and the conversation was stellar. By the time we got back to the beginning it was time to head back to the car and head home. When I dropped her off I asked her if she would mind if I called her. She responded pretty positively and that made me pretty excited. And that was date number 2. At least, the bare bones of it. So what was so great about it? Two things.

Like I said earlier, she seemed so comfortable and at ease with me. Not that that's a bad thing (in fact, a really good thing) but it's just not what I expected at all. I don't know when it'll stop suprising me, but for right now I am content to continually be surprised at who she really is. First impressions left me with the idea that she was this really quiet, very soft spoken, and generally agreeable person. None of those tend to hold true all the time and that's PERFECT. And not to mention, I put myself in her shoes and I don't know that I have the guts to let some college graduate pick me up, take me out on a date to the city, parts of which include long walks in dark canals. I respect it a ton and am very humbled by that.

Second thing, and the biggest part of the night... The dialogue. As we were walking the canal I asked her what was important. Left it vague and open like that because it's me and you know I'm good for those open ended questions that let me start to get and idea about who you really are by what you answer. She asked for a bit of help in direction and I said there was no direction, to take it wherever you want to go with it. Then I told her to tell me 3 important things. And then I told her she had to tell me 3 important things that didn't include the 3 things everyone would use to answer that (God, Family, Friends). And as she thought she came up with her 3 and some expanding thoughts with a few follow up questions I asked to make sure I understood what she meant by her answers....
1: Be open to change. God's made too many people with too many different experiences, perspectives, and understandings for me to get the idea that the way I do it, or the way I see it, or the way I think it is the 'best' or 'right' way. Life is one of those things that constantly requiring you to change and adapt, why would you fight so hard to stay the same when who you were then is not who you are now.
2: Let go of anger and resentment. (I thought this was a very curious choice from a girl who's struck me as so mild and timid, again a wonderful surprise to find out I am wrong) Though it's easy to talk about these two things in the form of interpersonal relationships, she's referring to circumstance in general. It's easy to become furious and exasperated by messed up things about our world and our life (IE: the education system and American Christianity, ironically 2 of my biggest soapboxes, which was about the biggest turn on a person like me can experience). Being so frustrated and annoyed at such things will only lead to ineffectiveness on my part. It's important to understand that if there's any chance at having an impact on such things, one needs to rid themselves of the extremes of such dislike, such as resentment and an overall chip on your shoulder.
3: You can't allow your background and life's experience to define who you are now and who you will be in the future. This is a crucial understanding if any of us is going to rise about all the crap in any of our lives, no matter what form that takes. If our past defines us then we will never allow ourselves to change (reference #1) and we will never grow.

Now, again, I know that I'm probably a peculiar person in this way, but ARE YOU SERIOUS!?!? There's absolutely no way that this girl answered that questions in those ways! Blown away. For all of you who know me, chances are you've heard me get on one of those soap boxes myself, or pushed you to your own personal understanding or healing via one of those routes. Even now as I recall that part of our conversation I am blown away that she really said all of those things. And to tell the truth I don't even know what to make of it all. I'll tell you what though, I'll bet you I'm about to make a big fool of myself or God's in the midst of all of this. Again, I sound cheesy saying that cause when people say things like that to me I roll my eyes and tell them to bring themselves down from the clouds and walk around in reality for a while. MAN! but those answers were so perfect. I don't know. She amazes me thus far.

So, I also forgot to say that date #3 got planned during the afternoon. She's coming down to the apartment next Saturday to help us decorate the apartment for Christmas. Phil's gonna bring someone down as well and we're gonna make a sweet day of it. We'll have hot chocolate and cider. There will be Christmas music and then we'll make dinner for them. The night will end with watching 'Love Actually', which Phil and I told ourselves we'd not watch again until Christmas time with a girl. In my wildest dreams I never thought that would come to fruition in any real sense.

So, what to make of this as a whole? To make some sort of sense of it quickly, this is what I've got. From May to before the 1st date when from nothing to intrigue. from before the date to after the flowers went from intrigue to infatuation. from the flowers to the end of date 2 moved from infatuation to 'holy crap, no more messing around. there's absolutely no reason you don't pursue a real relationship with this girl now'. So, that all leaves me with several big questions in my head that came up at the very beginning before I even asked her to go to the wedding with me, but they were questions I didn't need to work through because these were just dates and she was just a sweet girl and I didn't really expect for this to go so amazingly well, cause I mean, it's me, afterall. But now we've past a critical point where I need to work through these and come up with some answers for myself so I can attempt to move foreword with this. When I come to some resolution I may write them all down here. If you've got any wise words, then leave em on here, or maybe give me a call and talk some sense into me.

moms coming through in the clutch

So, today's the last day of work before a holiday. I'm all packed and ready to head home right after work, so it's obviously going to be an agonizingly long day because of what there is to look foreword to. Mom sends an email to me telling me that she's just got to be a mom and ask me if there's any way I can leave work early to head home cause it's begun to snow pretty hard in the north and half her office showed up late because of accidents on the roads. I'm obviously rolling my eyes because there's no way IM asking to leave early. However, I promise her I will at least ask. So, I walk into Marvin's office and chuckle a bit and ask him if there's any way I could leave right at 430 with the employees (I usually leave around 5) to make my mom happy because of this situation. Marvin decides he's gonna get paranoid about it too, so he's not gonna let me stay any later than 330 this afternoon so that I'm not in heavy traffic with the bad weather too. Wow, it's nice to know that everyone thinks i'm 16 years old again, but hey, im not complaining cause it's an hour and a half of work time that's not gonna be spent working and it's also saving me sitting in traffic for an hour or so more than I normally would. BONUS.

Things to post about that I know I am overdue on, but it will happen this weekend:
1: My 2nd Date
2: My upcoming 3rd Date.... (BOOYEAH!)

2nd date?!?

Phil and Noah got my hopes up for a phone call. I mean, I just sent the girl flowers out of the blue! They definitely had me ready and waiting for an exuberant phone call from her thanking me. Yeah, that didn'’t happen. Instead I got about a 5 line email. It was happy in it's tone, which was good, but I just let myself get too high of expectations. Later on I found out that she'’d had a sort of crappy day so the flowers actually where very good timing, and that made it all more worthwhile to me. I'’m glad I did it. However, I'’d already convinced myself that when she called all excited would also be a perfect time to ask her to go on another date with me. So, again, when she didn'’t call, that sort of took some wind out of my sails a bit. After thinking about it more though, I reminded myself just how much I really wanted to go on another date. So, Thursday on my all night road trip out to Shorb'’s, I got several pep-talks from several friends in order to gain the courage to actually give her a call and ask her out again. She said she'’d love to go out again and sounded pretty excited about it too, which kind of surprised me. Needless to say, the rest of the trip flew by cause I was on cloud nine. She wanted to come down to Indy this coming weekend. So, I'’m going to Taylor to pick her up and bring her down. Now all I have to do is figure out what to do. I'’ve been thinking about it pretty much since I got home Monday. I've got several ideas. In fact, I called her on Tuesday cause I kinda realized that I didn'’t even have a very solid idea about what exactly she enjoys doing, or what she would have fun doing with me in Indy. So, that was the goal. It was also a side goal to be on the phone with her for more than like 10 minutes (which would be about as long as it would take for her to answer my questions directly and hang up). In other words, I was really hoping to have a real phone conversation with her. I wasn't optimistic cause I didn'’t think she was that comfortable with me yet. So, when I called, she wasn'’t in the room, so I left a message. When she called back, to my surprise, we talked for over half an hour! Now, I could be totally wrong in this read of the situation, but it seemed to me that she was just as interested in having a real conversation with me as I was with her. I mean, she answered my questions, but we also talked about other stuff as well, and it wasn'’t like I was artificially asking questions to prolong the conversation past what it should have been. For about 35 minutes, the conversation flowed it'’s natural length and drew to a very natural close. Oh wow! It'’s a good feeling to have when you'’ve just talked on the phone with a girl for the first time in a causal sort of way. Maybe I'’m not making sense right now, but you know, It'’s just one of those things I guess. One of those things that does it for me. To talk on the phone just to talk and to hear her talk simply because you'’re so intrigued and infatuated by someone that you can'’t wait for the next meeting that you have to resort to the telephone!. I love it. I hope that it happens again soon and I hope it feels and normal and natural as this Tuesday night felt. So yeah, all that to say, we'’re gonna go walking downtown on Saturday. You know I will be a very unhappy camper if it rains, cause it'’s gonna be kinda chilly, so walking in the rain is out of the question, but walking in the cold is a definite possibility, and if we'’re walking in the cold, maybe she'’ll grab onto my arm again. And if it'’s cold, maybe she'’ll ask to wear my coat and if that happens you can be sure that you and I will never speak again cause I will promptly have heart failure and die, but it will be the most exquisite mental state one could be in, I'’m sure and if that's the way I die, I think I could be quite fine with that.

Rejoice

Thursday I left work at 4:30pm and by 2:30am I was at the home of Nate & Erica Shorb. I then proceeded to spend 4 days of absolute bliss with the two of them. The drive went very well (more on that in the next post). It was so good to get on the road. I'’m very satisfied with my decision to drive instead of fly. I needed that alone time for some reason. I mean, it'’s not like my days are inundated with people or anything like that. I think I just needed to get out and have a little adventure of my own. Granted, I'’m not a very adventurous guy, but there'’s not a whole lot more freeing than driving on the interstate at 1am.

Bethlehem Pennsylvania is about as quaint as a town can get I think. I forget how flat Indiana is sometimes and I think that if I would end up somewhere with hills and mountains, that would be fine by me. The trees were beautiful still, which was a bit of a surprise, but on this sunny weekend it made for quite a spectacle outside. My dear friend Nate and I have taken turns over the past 3 to 4 months calling each other about every 3 weeks and telling the other one how desperately we need to see the other because we are in jobs that we can'’t really stand and every day is like another day of life being sucked right out of us. This has made for some very depressing times and mental and emotional stress of unparalleled measure for the both of us. I'’ve been planning to come out since labor day weekend, actually, and for whatever reason it hasn't been able to happen until this last weekend. Well, I do believe that the reason for the delay was for timing's sake. I showed up at a time when, I think we both seriously needed a dear friend within physical proximity and both needed to identify with someone else going through about the same sorts of things. And with that said, the coffee runneth over. What did we do? Not a whole lot except for talk. We ran into Philly one night for Cheese steaks, but other than that it was company. We drank and talked and talked and listened and put on another pot of coffee to drink afterward, then talked some more. How do you put into words the experience of coming back together with a true, genuine friend after too much time and distance have separated them? I am lost to describe it, but I know that God filled my spirit back up through the presence of my friend. It did not matter that what we were sharing were hard things, troubling things. It was of no consequence that at this particular juncture we are not spending our lives in ways that we would have hoped we were. It mattered that we were together, talking again.

It was very appropriate that Sunday night, at the bible study we attended, the topic was Romans 5 and Paul talking about suffering.

Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance, character, and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

-Romans 5:3-5

We talked long and hard about the word '‘rejoice' in there. What'’s Paul talking about? So often we want to try and make what we would assume to be a literal interpretation in that we should rejoice, or be happy, or content, or optimistic, or any number of things that would allude to the idea that we should not be angry, frustrated, exasperated, pissed off, depressed, or hurting. This is not the truth, I don'’t think. Paul'’s a smart guy and Paul'’s also a guy who experienced his share of suffering. He knew what it was to get the crap beat out of him and run out of town. Do you think he was happy about the beating? Don'’t get me confused, he does talk about delighting in his suffering, but this is reference more toward the idea of it being a specific means to a particular end which he is very focused on (the spreading of the gospel to the Gentiles). I don't think Paul is stupid enough to think that we should all be so happy about getting the crap beat out of us either physically or mentally, spiritually, emotionally, etc. So, what is he saying and why does he throw that word '‘rejoice' in there then? Again, remember that Paul was a phenomenally smart guy. He was the equivalent of a lawyer in his days as a Pharisee. This is the book of Romans which is hardcore & in your face. It doesn'’t make sense that Paul would throw in a cheesy, flowery, warm and fuzzy word in here. And this is why when Paul says '‘rejoice'’ itÂ's important to understand that he'’s saying REMEMBER! Remember your faith in a benevolent God who is good for all of the promises he'’s made to you about you and your life'’s purpose and path. HeÂ's saying that you should remember that and bank on it. Doesn'’t mean that you should be happy about the fact that life sucks for whatever reason currently. Rather, it means that by remembering the reality of your life as a whole, you can continue on KNOWING that you will live to see better days. There'’s something about living with such confidence that produces a certain sort of hope. And grabbing hold of that internal hope is the equivalent of what Paul is imploring us to do when he says '‘REJOICE'’. Thus, the weekend ended in tearful, soulful, prayer and intercession for one another. My dear friends...

On a side note... If I were to ever experience a temporary moment of crazy sanity and courage you would be able to locate me out in Coopersburg Pennsylvania as the owner of Cooper Mansion. The plan would be to turn the downstairs into my coffee shop. The rest of the house would be turned into the beginning living arrangements for the commune that we'’re going to start. Shorb and Erica already said they are in. We think Neville would probably be game, as well as another couple from around there. I'’d take out some loans to cover the costs of starting up the coffee shop and the rest is history. It would either be called '‘Shorb'’s'’ or the Pieroggi Factory. Eventually everyone in the commune would staff the coffee shop which would support us all modestly. I think it'’s a wonderful plan, and though it sounds like a pipe dream of sorts, As we were brainstorming this all, I think that if I ever did decide to go for it, I think I could come close to pulling it off. Oh what a real chicken I am. There'’s not really a terribly good reason that I don'’t at least try to get this plan started and see if there'’s some way to get some of that money together to do such a thing. Again, what do I have to lose? So, yeah, if I all of a sudden disappear for a while, you may wanna check Coopersburg.

Flowers

I sent her flowers today. It only took a friend's suggestion (thank you Amy) and about half of the day to get up the courage to do such a foreword thing, but in the end, today, she's going to receive 3 daises in a little vase with a 2 sentence message from me. I want her to feel like a million bucks or like she's on top of the world, or that someone may actually think she's worth the attention, or that God's not forgotten her in loneliness. Flowers can say a lot of things, but why these specifically? Because that's how I felt all day on Saturday. And that's how good things went... Good enough for someone like me to work up the courage to send her flowers after a first date. That is saying no small thing at all. My friend Eric Bland later told me that he was a little worried for me and that I might be setting myself up for disappointment with the first date being a 15 hour long deal, 9 of which were spent alone in a car. The drive up was relentless conversation which is so much fun and almost dizzying at times. The opportunity to meet a new person and to ask real questions and hear someone give real heartfelt responses... Intoxicating almost. She isn't who I was expecting her to be and that was all the more exciting. This sweet girl who did sweet things like write me a 'thank-you' note for a pick a date and stayed till after everyone else left the Inservice I spoke at just to say hi to me and catch up a bit. The seemingly shy and unassuming girl who invited me down to see her airband act after they got in... Yeah, I finally got to spend enough time to actually get to know who she was and what she was all about. It's funny to think about, I'm sure, but you have no idea at all what 3 things as sweet as that can do for someone who's just moved to a city for 6 months and considers himself 'alone'. (I think it was along those lines that I gathered the courage to send her flowers, because even if she thought Saturday was horrible and she threw up when she got home, the least I can do is attempt to repay such things with the same disregard of risk)

We showed up late to the wedding. In fact, the bride and groom were seen at the alter through the windows as we drove up. I wouldn't have had it any other way, cause it didn't matter. She kind of got worried for a moment, but I laughed and she laughed and I hope she caught on that the wedding was just a side story and that the day was about being with her. I certainly didn't care about showing up late, in fact, I liked it better that way. Something about it seemed good and right. After the wedding people came up to see me and I didn't realize how good it would feel to introduce her as my date to everyone. So, yeah, maybe a little cheesy to say, but I liked that part alot. We walked out of the church and it had been raining so I stuck out my arm and SHE TOOK IT! Remembering that singular aspect of the day could probably make a whole month of work fly by with a little less drudgery and gloom.... wow. My friend Christine hung out with us for the whole reception and I enjoyed doing everything I could with my attention, body language, conversation, eye contact, etc to let Angela know that I was all about her even if I maybe knew Christine better. I was glad that on several occasions that Christine acknowledged that Angela was, in fact, my date. I don't know, maybe this all sounds overly retarded and hopelessly stupid to you, but all I can say to that is God knows me perfectly and he knows perfectly what I need to lift my spirit to new heights even after long periods of low-lying, joy-deprived days. Even if Angela never talks to me again, in this one day, her day long sacrifice to accompany me was used by God to take me, mentally and emotionally, out of where I was and push me to be at a new place.

Will there be a second date? I certainly hope so, and I have a feeling I'll make a bumbling idiot out of myself to try and make it happen. However, even if there isn't, I think I could find some contentment in the amount of giddy joy I had for a day in the beginning of November. And so, the point is, Angela is sweeter than I knew before and God is as good as He's always been to me.

What it's All About

Tuesday night was the Jem concert. It was pretty sweet. The venue was pretty intimate and cool at the same time. Concert stage in a corner of the room and a few tables and chairs set up along the sides in place, but the rest was open and so we stood for the whole thing. It was interesting to see the wide range of ages present to this underground British rock group's show. Most of it was young people, of course, but there were a suprising amount of grey haired couples in the mix. It made me love them and I hope that I can be that open to things when I'm that age. The moral of the story is this... going to a cool concert at a cool little music venue on a Tuesday night has a way of making you feel like you're a cool city person (even if you're really not much of one).

Last night I traveled to Marion, IN to the Tree of Life coffee shop to hear Donald Miller (Author of Blue Like Jazz) do a reading and a bit of question-answer time. The place was packed and I ended up standing in an isle of books listening more than watching, which was ok. As I was driving up I became hesitant about going. If you've read any of his stuff you can identify with how unassuming of a writer he is. Everyone who reads his stuff just assumes that, in real life, he would be one of your friends who comes into your room, sits on the couch and kind of chews the fat with you about random stuff. This is great, and a big contributor to the size of his readership. However, I began to wonder what it would do to me to find out that in real life he was some sort of pompous schmuck. What if he got here, told us all about how amazing he was, how much better his work was than everyone else's, and how wrong other people were if they didn't like it? So, I began to get a little worried and I realized the night was going to be more about not disappointing me than it was going to be about charming or impressing me. That said, I can honestly say that I am of the same opinion of the guy now as I was before hearing him last night. He read and spoke and answered questions with the same sort of unassuming, low-keyed depth that he writes his books with. At the end he was signing books so I went up to get my book signed. I told him that my roommate's mom had written a study to go along with Blue Like Jazz. I asked him if he was familiar with Carol Daubenmire's work. He thought for a second and then he said, 'yeah! Isn't she the one who wrote the good sized one?' I said I wasn't sure what a normal sized one was, but that I'd read through hers and I figured it was the one he was talking about. He got a big smile on his face and told me to pass on a thank you to her for having the desire to write such a work. And with that he signed my copy of the book. How exciting aye? Got to talk to the author, and got to see the author get a bit excited about the work of someone else who im connected with. So, there you are Mrs. Daubenmire, Donald Miller seemed pleased enough with your work that he gave a genuine thank you for me to pass on to you.

Now, on to things that have given this week wings for the days to fly by in anticipation... Tomorrow I will drive to Upland and have breakfast with my little sister. She will, no doubt, spend her time telling me to calm down and not mess up the rest of the day by being a schmuck (We'll talk about other things as well), Then I'll run up on the Penthouse and wake up a few people just to say hi since im on campus. I can't really justify not going up on that floor at any time afforded to me. Then, at about 11:30, I'm gonna pick Angela up and we're heading to Chicago. It's gonna be all day, it's gonna be a lot of driving, it's gonna be alot of talking. I am nervous, however, I am also very excited. I'm trying to figure out how to make things as not awkward as possible, but I'm sure with a 4 hour car ride both ways, it's probably unavoidable. No matter what though, I hope that she leaves the date feeling like the wedding was a reason to spend time with her, and not that she was just someone who would afford me the ability to simply go to the wedding. I mean, I want to go to this wedding cause Sharon's a good friend and I'll look foreword to seeing her get married, but really, everyone there is going to be a mild acquaintance save 2 or 3 people and even those people are all going to have their own things and people to see and hang out with and catch up and all that jazz, so really, im' not even concerned with whether or not I even spend any time at all catching up with any of them. I get to spend the entire day with a sweet girl who I'm dying to get to know as much about as possible because she's done some really genuinely sweet things for me over the past few months and I just have to get to know her more. And THAT is what tomorrow is all about for me.

A date?!

Well, my endless thanks to my roommate, my sister, and parents for giving me the courage to not chicken out of this wedding and find a date. I just got the call that Angela is gonna go to Chicago with me this weekend. And with one phone call this weekend changes from one of sulking and feeling like a schmuck to going on a date with a girl (hey, it may sound trite to you, but this is me we're talking about). So yeah, hopefully I don't screw it up.

Today is Halloween and Phil got real excited about it and went out and bought a bunch of candy over his lunch break for the kids. And, for all his excitement and money spent, we got 4 visitors. Half of which were kids who are probably too old to be trick or treating. What a let down.

Today is also the day my roommate begins living a healthy lifestyle again. He's been on hiatus for a month on account of the monopoly game at McDonald's. Needless to say, in the span of 4 weeks IM guessing he took 6 to 8 months off of his life. Good luck with the detox Phil.

On a side note, My eyes have been opened to the wonderful world of facebook. Wow! What a wonderful thing that someone created to give us reason to waste hours on end doing pretty much nothing. Oh well, look me up and be my friend.

Laundromats

If our apartment Laundromat was a person I would fight it right now. Every time I do laundry (approximately every 2 weeks or so) I have about 4 dryer loads of clothes to dry. Inevitably one of 3 things happens: A) a load is unbalanced and stops running after about 5 minutes B) someone opens the door of it to see if there's something in it and doesn't press the start button again after they shut it C) (this is what happened toned) someone takes my wet clothes out of the dryer, sets them on the table but doesn't put anything else in the dryer. All of these scenarios are really cool when I drive back to the laundry room an hour later to find that I still have another hour and a half or so of waiting before I can go to bed on Sunday night (which is usually when I do laundry). As if this wasn't frustrating enough, my roommate Phil usually does laundry at the same time with me. He is yet to have any of his loads of laundry not dry all the way. What the heck?! Thus, if the Laundromat were a person I would fight them.

A profound excerpt from Blue Like Jazz that I just read

The thing I have to work on in myself is this issue of belief. Gandhi believed Jesus when He said to turn the other cheek. Gandhi brought down the British Empire, deeply injured the caste system, and changed the world. Mother Teresa believed Jesus when He said everybody was priceless, even the ugly ones, the smelly ones, and Mother Teresa changed the world by showing them that a human being can be selfless. Peter finally believed the gospel after he got yelled at by Paul. Peter and Paul changed the world by starting small churches in godless towns.
Eminem believes he is a better rapper than other rappers. Profound. Let's all follow Eminem.
Here is the trick, and here is my point. Satan, who I believe exists as much as I believe Jesus exists, wants us to believe meaningless things for meaningless reasons. Can you imagine if Christians actually believed that God was trying to rescue us from the pit of our own self-addiction? Can you imagine? Can you imagine what Americans would do if they understood over half the world was living in poverty? Do you think they would change the way they live, the products they purchase, and the politicians they elect? If we believed the right things, the true things, there wouldn't be very many problems on earth.

Donald Miller, Blue Like Jazz

A Rosie Thomas song I can't stop listening to

OCTOBER

Make her a flower in late December when the sun is not shining on her
Write her a love song and play it all day long to remind her of all that she is worth
Never, Never leave her

Take her on long drives for ice cream by seaside and give her your coat when she is cold
Tell her you miss her when you're close enough to kiss her and that you'd walk 1000 miles to tell her so
Never, Never leave her

Take photographs of her on Brooklyn street in October when her nervous smile is slightly curved
Some days when she's slightly down tell her it's ok to frown it make you just fall more in love with her
Never, Never, never, never leave her

-Rosie Thomas

I am a lonely schmuck.

I am a lonely schmuck. It's a pretty pathetic state to be in, but it's true none the less. I dont think im going to a good friend's wedding becuase of this. How selfish is that? On a lighter night, It's official, im taking 2 vacation days in the middle of next month to see Shorb and Erica. The big question now... Do I fly or do i drive?

2nds

I'm working 2nd shift for Thursday, Friday, and Monday. We took a rush job at the warehouse and now we have to keep the place open twice as long to get everything through. It's not as bad as I was thinking it was going to be. Yesterday it was good to sleep in (to 730) and just sort of be lazy most of the day. Working in the evening isn't so bad and it kind of reminded me of nights going in to close Courthouse down (except not really at all by the end of the night). So Ill work the same shift tonite and depart for home right afterwards. Should make for a long sleepy drive. On a side note. Notre Dame plays USC this weekend. I've been a bit nervous since tuesday. ESPN has done a good job of hyping it. I just can't decide what to expect. I hope i dont have a mortally wounding saturday afternoon if they dont win... no promises though.

Homecoming

This weekend was a truely blessed time for me. It was great to be back and to see everyone. At one point during the weekend it felt like I was back there again. Oh, how much I crave the oportunity to be that useful and effective again. I felt like I did more worthwhile things in the last 4 days than I have done in the last 6 months. Wow. It felt as if it was yet another step in God showing me where my heart really lies and where my gifts and purpose truely will be realized. I hope that people I talked to don't forget to keep me updated on life. On a side note, my sister is wonderful. Words don't describe that relationship. On a second note, I got to coach a girls football game tonite. YES.

Taylor time

So, the last few weeks have definately had a Taylor flavor for me. Two weeks ago I was invited down for the PA inservice to be the guest speaker (more on that soon). This last week I was asked by the admissions office to go to Herritage Christian Highschool and be a representative for their big college fair. Tonite I'm going up to see Tracy and watch airband. Then this weekend Im heading up for Homecoming. So, yeah, T.U. aye?

Contentment

Contentment. It’s one of those things that you don’t think about when you’ve got it, but can’t get past it when you don’t have it. What causes contentment? I’ve asked myself that a few times over the past months, but with no real answer. Part of me wants to say that contentment is something experienced when one is where they’re supposed to be. When I’m fulfilled and beneficial, doing things that are worthwhile and with purpose, I feel content. Another part of me thinks that contentment as all a frame of mind. If I just get myself to believe that wherever I find myself, in whatever situation, I am where I want to be and should be. In other words, the grass is always going to be greener somewhere else, but if I just remind myself to look around me and appreciate what I do have and the good things about where I am at, then I will find contentment. I’m sure there are a lot of other perspectives on this, but these seem to be the two ends of a sort of internal tug-of-war. I find myself, at times, quite discontent; very uncomfortable with where I’m at and what I’m doing with an intense desire to change directions quickly. I know that the discontentment comes directly from my job and I know what it is about my job that causes so much strife internally. However, I am constantly going back and forth about whether this discontent is the realization that this job that I am in is far and away not something that I am supposed to be doing for a very long period of time or if it’s simply something that I’ve figured out isn’t for me that much and I’m amplifying the situation beyond what is rationally necessary.

This weekend has been spent in a similar vein as a few spent at the end of July, thinking about how this job is sucking the life out of me day by day and how I am doing a horrible disservice to myself by simply sucking it up and continuing on not looking forward to the upcoming day. Part of me thinks that by doing such a stubborn thing that I am doing direct harm to my spiritual life. I mean, in the last four months there has been little to no desire to serve others at all. There’s been minimal desire to participate in the community of believers, and I’ve begun to approach my spiritual life in a very selfish and conceited mannor. I go to church for me, not to be a blessing to others. When I think of engaging with others in the church, it’s more for my perceived necessity for a social group as opposed to an attempt to really be a part of the community. Not only am I not involved in any sort of ministry, if one were to fall into my lap I would turn away from it because I have little physical, mental, or spiritual energy to focus on anything other than my own situation and life. This is not what God’s called for me in my life. This is not what my spiritual life and ministry outlook are supposed to be. If I can honestly say that this job is the primary cause to such a selfish and dysfunctional approach to my spiritual life, then I should not continue on in such a thing. However, there’s the flip side to such an avenue of thought. If I simply stop, step outside of my own selfishness long enough to look at things in a broader perspective I remember that the situation I find myself in is an extremely blessed one. I am in a job that is paying me very well; much more that I really need, in fact. I don’t worry about paying bills or buying food or putting gas in my car. I have most of my evenings and weekends free to do whatever I want. My boss is a wonderful Christian man who cares very much about me. My apartment is nice, my roommate is very good, my family is supportive, etc. etc. How many people would give up a lot to find themselves in such a situation. Certainly I am being to selfish and narrow minded to appreciated all the blessings that are present in my life currently and the idea that I am going to let the amout of fulfillment in my job to dictate such a high level of discontent in the rest of my life is foolish and ridiculous. Certainly God would see any attempt to change jobs so soon would be a slap in the face or a rejection of the blessings he’s given me. After all, where’s the perseverance in the midst of trails? Where’s the faith that I’m supposed to be living with daily?

And so I go back and forth. Stick the job out for a year, or change after 6 months. For the past month, it’s been ‘stick out the year’. At the end of this weekend, it’s ‘change at 6 months’. Who knows what it will be like tomorrow. I continue to pray, as I have ceaselessly for the past 3 months, that God would somehow clear up the muddy water in my thinking. I want my life to be one that is glorifying to Him. I want to make choices that honour the blessings he’s bestowed upon me in my life. Easier said than done. Any advice?

Don't call it a comeback

So, for the last month and a half i've neglected this thing pretty much. So, here's my renewed commitment to keep this updated.

I'm at work. It's friday. This week's cruised by, which is good. The weather is cool and sunny, which is very enjoyable. Justin Thomas is coming down to visit us tonite. The boss is gone today. I look foreward to rest and relaxation this weekend and one post of depth before monday.

Summer is fading fast

This week, i have a feeling, was summer's last gasp before yielding into the perfect time of year... yes, the fall. Today was an utterly perfect welcoming ceremony. It was overcast all day with the rain moving in about mid afternoon... In the warehouse, i was by myself, sounds were muted, it started to get dark noticibly early, and of course, I had my mellow music on, which resulted in a sweet sweet melancholy mood. Tonight would be a great time to go on a walk with someone. If I was at Taylor now, I'd definately find someone to go on a walk with. Hopefully I'll find someone worth walking in the rain with before the season passes by. (Ok, that's a little wishful thinking for you)

Closer

I thoroughly love the film 'Closer'. I don't recommend it to most anyone, but I love it. It's amazingly depressing and hopeless, but so deep and symbolic. The writers of that script blow me away each time I watch it. So, we watched it tonite at the apartment. I'm quite depressed. It's a good kind of depressed though. People at times tend to worry about me when I get in these sort of melancholy moods, but they shouldn't. I'm fine. I do my best thinking and writing in moods like this. So, don't get me wrong here, chances are, you shouldn't watch this movie. But if you must, we should watch it together so we can have quality discussions about it afterwards, to make sure that it was appreciated for what it is.

So, we're half way through september. Life's been moving along pretty well. The most exciting thing that I've discovered in the past week: If I choose to place my vacation days a certain way, i could have a 3 day weekend every two weeks from now through Christmas. WHOA! So, that means that Shorb, you better plan on a visit sometime between now and then.

My dad just called me. I've just been summoned to jury duty for the 4th time in 2 years. Some people go their whole lives without being called to jury duty. Wierd.

$3.19

Yesterday morning I drove into work with my gas light blinking cause i was almost empty. I thought of filling up at the gas station on the corner on my way to work. However, as I passed, I saw that the price was $2.57 a gallon. A little depressed at the price, i decided, for whatever stupid reason, to not fill up and wait till after work. Bad idea. I drove home only to see that the price was now $3.19 a gallon. WHOA! nothing like a 60 cent jump in like 9 hours. So, needless to say, i was in no mood to fill up then either. By this point my gas light is shining brightly at me. This morning I go in to work and stop at a Sam's Club gas station that, for whatever reason was selling gas at $2.89. I pulled up, put the hose in and pulled the handle only for nothing to happen. I looked up and around to figure out what was happening, only to notice that all the other people there were doing exactly the same thing. The clerk came out promptly to announce that they were out of gas. Crap. I had left early in order to get gas as well as some breakfast becuase we don't have milk in the fridge at home for cereal. However, as I passed McDonnalds, the line was alot longer than my gas tank would have held out for, so i drove to the corner gas station, where I had to wait to get to a pump and filled up with $3.19 gas. The total came to just over $40. To rub salt in the wound, there was now no time to get any breakfast, so now I'm at work, hungry, and lighter in the wallet. What a day this is starting off to be.

Becca's birthday & the Daubenmire family

This weekend has been pretty enjoyable. 4 Taylor people have moved down to the Indy area, and so we've gotten to hang out with them quite a bit in the last 2 weeks. Chad and Bates live on the east side of town. Becca and Abby live in the center of town. Friday was Becca's birthday so, Phil and I made plans to take her out. It was a fun night. We got all dressed up and drove down to pick up the girls and then met Chad down at the Spaghetti Factory, where we ate dinner. After dinner we went to the Slippery Noodle, which is a sweet jazz club. It was good company and conversation. We didn't let Becca pay for anything, which was fun to do cause we didn't tell her we were gonna do that, and it's not a situation where either of us were obligated to do that either. So, we enjoyed it. There's just something about making a girl feel like she's special that just does it for me from time to time. I mean, I guess that's a little wierd to say, but I can say it like that cause I dont have a girlfriend, and haven't for a while, and the way things are going, that's not changing any time soon either. So, with that as the perspective the statement is coming from, it's nice to have the random chance to do that for someone. Anyone else wanna let me make them feel special???

Yesterday, Phil's family came over from Cincinnati to watch a big airshow in town. We planned to unveil our Citrus Pasta for them that night, so when they left, I went to the store and got everything. They came home around 7 and Phil & I went to work on our culinary skills. The evening was wonderful and enjoyable. The pasta came out just as good as when we'd previously done it. You can't go wrong with Jazz music, candle light, and fabulous conversation. The Daubenmire family is one of the more charming families I've had the privilege to get to know. His dad is a thought-provoking individual who's calm, even tone is thoroughly engaging to me. I recall our conversation in Cincy earlier in July at the coffee shoppe (I still have to write about that trip and that coffee shoppe), as well as his story last night and am convinced that there are many of life's truths to glean from this man simply by sitting and listening. Phil's mom has a love for people that transcends time, age, geography, or circumstance. You could brush past that comment without consequence unless you have been around me enough to know what my definition of love in the context of friendship involves and invokes. The lucky individuals who find her involved in their lives on a daily or weekly level must truly count themselves blessed that God would include in their lives someone who embodies such a wholly rounded perspective on friendship and love. Phil's brother, Stu, is a sweetheart and I think he gets that honestly from his older brother. It's evident to me, simply by watching their interactions, that Stu looks up to Phil. Wonderful, absolutely wonderful... Phil is one of my life's biggest sweethearts, and to see Stu so interested in following his brother's example as far as demeanor and personality, is a good thing in my book. Stu's girlfriend Abby (who seems adorable) came along. They've been dating for 3 years or so, which reminded me overhearing conversation in Cincy that they'd decided they were going to break up before they go to college.... I hope an opportunity presents itself to me for the chance to maybe throw my two unwanted sense in on that one... Or maybe I'll write it all out for Phil to say to him. It would probably mean more coming from Phil anyway. Phil's little sister Elizabeth makes me smile. Throughout both visits, there were multiple times when I wanted to laugh out loud, but refrained from doing so cause I think it was funny, simply because I'm not a member of the family, just kind of watching from the outside. She's in middleschool and I don't know if it's the age, or the gender, or what, but she has many many little idiosyncrasies about her. She's not very talkative at all, but I am always very aware of her presence in very comical ways. For as much flack as she catches from absolutely everyone else in the family, I'm impressed at the way she responds to it, with an eye roll or body language that communicates her messages without words. She makes me laugh internally. The only one not present yesterday was Kevin, who has just left to begin college at Dayton. From time around him in Cincy, I get the feeling that college will be a good fit for him. I hope that he finds a good circle of friends, cause he seems to be one who will offer much to other guys. He seems very straighforeward and clear-cut, with no non-sense. People will appreciate that at school. He also seems to be a bit of an adventurous spirit, which always serves people well during college. I wish I'd gone in with one instead of spending four years developing one. So, all in all, the group of them is wonderful to be around and I enjoy them thoroughly. I'll look foreword to the next trip to Cincinnati.

Freshmen

So, the freshmen go to Taylor today. I went to bed last night and couldn't fall asleep cause I was thinking about my PA's. So, i got up and called them all. It was good to hear from them. I'm sure they'll do a wonderful job today. I'm only a little depressed.

Cruising along

So, this week has been a relatively good week. Most of this can be chalked up to the unseasonably cool and rainy weather. The first 2 days of the week were below 80 as a high and rainy. Days in the warehouse go by so much less miserably when im not sweating for 9 and a half hours straight. Also, it's been interesting this week at work becuase we hired a Peruvian woman who speaks no english. It's been great to try my best to make her feel welcomed and appreciated. My boss Marvin is from Mexico and is relatively fluent and told me she works so furiously becuase she's caught quite a bit of grief and discrimination in her past 2 jobs becuase of her ethnicity. So, needless to say, my heart immediately went out to her and am trying my best to let her know that I am happy she's working with me. It's almost gotten me to pick up my spanish vocab cards to work on my speaking ability. Eat your heart out Dr. Treber!

So, the week has pretty well cruised along relatively smoothly, which was much needed. As an added bonus, Marvin's kicking me out tomorrow at 2 and it sounds like Amy Barnett's coming to chill with me. There's even an outside chance that my sister will be down to hang out in the evening. I'm crossing my fingers.

Kristyna

Today at work Marvin and I were putting some stickers on books and so we were talking to pass the time also. He asked me if I'd ever been overseas. So I told him I went to the Czech Republic. He then asked quite a few questions about the experience, so much so that I found myself telling stories and remembering several things. Most importantly I brought back up all of the thoughts and feelings around Kristyna, the baby orphan that I walked around with for 2 days. Oh, my how time so easily allows things to slip into the grey area of your mind. I think and pray for Kristyna weekly, however, I haven't made myself remember everything about her and that experience for quite some time. So, it was good, but also made for a very sober and meloncholy rest of the day. To those who've had the oportunity to get outside of this country and to experience the reality of a whole other world of culture and personal experiences... remember those things. And if you're ever going to travel or do missions in any capacity, you need to write your experiences down, lest you loose 90 percent of what really happened and turn it into so happy pleasent memory or let it turn into just a chance to tell someone that you traveled somewhere. What a waste of experiences that could mean the world and change your perspective. Do all you can to remember. I remember Kristyna today. Will she be the same to me in a year as she was to me today?

Vosberg

Vos was up this weekend and it was another spectacular one put on by Chelsea Village Bldg 2010 Apt D. He came down and Phil loved him. I think He loved phil too... ok, that sounds pretty gay. But in the manliest sense possible, yeah, we all had a wonderful time together. I can't begin to write the thoughts and feelings of having a lifelong friend like Vos. We've pretty much known each other since we were two years old. We're the kind of friends who can live our lives and allow that to bring us close, then far apart and back together again only to pick up where we left off as if no time or space had been experienced. Vosberg is truely one of God's good blessings in my life and I hope I have the privileage to continue this relationship as life passes on.

Friday we at steak at Tony Roma's then went down to Broadripple and on to a sweet local dive called Daddy Jack's. It was pretty upscale and a terrific night to sit outside on the sidewalk and talk for a few hours. Saturday we woke up late and I fixed breakfast for everyone (I am beginning to realize how much i thoroughly enjoy cooking). We then drove around for a bit. Came home then visited the Hookah Bar again (we haven't been there since ben & april were down for the 4th). Vos loved that. Afterwards we went to a sweet Irish Pub place on 96th street near Phil's bank for dinner. The waitress was very nice and I think all three of us developed a small crush on her before the meal was finished. I think she liked me best because I ordered her suggestion from the menu (Good thing it matters since we'll never see her again in the rest of our lives). We then decided to head back to the apartment and sat out on the balcony and talked into the wee hours. Wonderful.

Sunday Vos went home and we went to church. The 20's class went very well as people started to recognize us and introduce themselves and invite us to join them. I think next week we're probably going to go to lunch with them at someone's house. It'll be a good chance for the friends list to grow, that's for sure.

Stella

Friday at work was the third day that we brought in a 73 year old retired woman to work for us. It's kind of odd... I mean, it's hot, humid, and not alot of fun to do our work for 8 hours a day, but this lady, i guess, is just really really bored and was ecstatic when we told her she could work if she wanted. Well, she's from south carolina on a cotton & tobacco farm, so she's got quite the southern drawl. She also never wears her hearing aid while working and is pretty much deaf without it, so when I go over to her table to ask her a question or tell her something she'll usually wait till i've been talking for a few seconds before she stops me and puts her hearing aid in. It's a little awkward, but hey, for whatever reason she seems to really enjoy it. So, the story... We're sitting down on break, the 4 of us who are working friday. We are all trading a bit of small talk i guess when Stella (her name is Stella) looks my way with a really puzzled look and asks, "Now Travis, do you have yourself a special girlfriend?" I laughed mostly because a 73 year old woman was interested in conversing about my romantic dating life, but also becuase of the heavy drawl with which she said it, and also becuase that's how I respond when people ask me such absurd questions. I calmed down and told her that I did not, and she said, "Well! then we're just going to have to find you that special girlfriend. I go to a little Presbyterian church downtown and I only know 2 other old ladies, but don't worry, we'll find her." And at that I laughed awkwardly and then told everyone the break was over and it was time to go back to work.

So, the moral of the story is: Don't worry about me being single for the rest of my days because the situation has been taken into the capable hands of Stella, my 73 year old southern belle temp employee.

Culinary Artists

Sunday night while Phil and I were at the grocery store buying food for the week (it was a pretty good time as it was because Phil got his first paycheck and we began to buy some less vital things that cost some money but will last a long time like spices and stuff...) we decided that one night this week we would do a little group cooking and make some sweet Italian meal. Well, as we were thinking we decided we were gonna get a little crazy and try something we'd never really heard of or had a recipe for. Citrus Pasta was in the works... There was chicken, vegetables, fruit, and pasta. That's all the more specific I am at liberty to get at this point. We told a few people including Phil's mom and a few ladies who work at the bank with him. Everyone seemed to be a bit excited to see if we could pull it off, or if it would simply turn into something to fill the bottom of the trash can with. So, last night was the night. We both went home from work and right into the kitchen. About an hour or so later we were pretty sure that what we'd made looked spectacular, but we were yet to try it. We did up the dining room nice, with the table cloth and a glass of white wine, silver wear and napkins along with a few candles; Rosie Thomas as background music... After we prayed that God would guard our stomachs for this adventure in the works we promised that we wouldn't say anything or pass judgment for 5 bites. And the eating began. Oh! It was so so good! In fact, it was better than I think either of us had planned on it being. Our citrus pasta was entrancing. Complex to the pallet because of all the different ingredients in it, there was something different about each bite. It was also nice and sweet, but not like a candy where it got to be too much after a bit. The presentation was good with all of the different colored fruit and vegetables over the bowtie pasta. So, in conclusion, if you come visit us, there's a good chance we could break out the secret recipe and let you try it for yourself. Citrus Pasta... MMM MMM.

Wretch

'Their deaths don't make headlines. Only their parents remember their names.' This was the ending sentance from an article about the 'Hungry season' in Niger. Every year there is a stretch of time between when crops are planted and when they are harvested that food supplies are generally stretched past their limits. However, since there was a severe drought for the past year, the hungry season has basically been going on since last year's planting. Various aid groups and such are attempting to make it into the small towns across the country to find the worst cases (mainly children) in order to get them immediate attention or take them to the closes hospitals. Unfortunately it's becoming almost impossible to do this becuase everyone in the villages turns out becuase they know there will be free food and medicine there, so there are so many people that it's not worth trying to screen the extremely malnourished from the boarderline healthy. If they did, there would be riots. And so thousands of children have died because of a food shortage and thousands more will continue to die. I thought this last sentance was very appropriate becuase it was simple, pessimistic and extremely depressing. That's exactly what this situation is. Simple. People dont have enough food to keep their bodies functioning. Pessimistic. Noone cares, not even enough for there to be any real world attention to it. Depressing. These little lives are being snuffed out and the only ones who will care are the parents of dead child.

'Amazing grace, how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me.' A wretch. Yes, that is me. Today I am a wretch not because I dont love God or because I take God for granted or because I lack the discipline or devotion that should be the response of a real sinner saved by grace. Becuase of the presence of those realities in my life daily, I will call myself simply a sinner today. But today I will call myself a WRETCH because I will go home from work today and sit down and stare at my refrigerator and try to decide what I feel like eating. Or, better yet, I will go out with a couple of friends and order something on the menu that sounds good. Niger will be a million miles away in my mind and I wont care (not enough for there to be real change in my actions or activities). It is only a truely sick, wretched person who, when enlightened and confronted with such indisputably wrong and unfair realities, turns away and continues the imbalance of such a scale.

Hit on by the Jimmy John's girl

Today was a pretty good day, if I do say so myself. Work went pretty smoothly and I think I am beginning to get into a bit of a routine with it. The kids I work with are pretty good kids for the most part too. It'll be different when they go back to school and I work with adults all day though, im sure.

Highlight of the day: I was grabbing dinner at Jimmy John's ( a local sub shop just down the corner on 86 & township line) and the girl taking my order had a peculiar exchange with me. I walked in the door and a girl behind the counter a ways made eye contact with me and smiled really big. I walked up and asked if I could have a #1. She said 'I don't know, can you?' with a little smirk on her face. Being my normal self, I realize that she's making one of the most annoying jokes that there can be, and so mentally, I am rolling my eyes and thinking, "oh come on already, just give me my sandwich." So I come back with something very exasperating like, "well, I would like to ORDER a #1 please, if that's alright with you." And then there was a pause and she just stared at me for a moment. It was long enough that I noticed it and started to feel awkward. So, I looked at her and she was staring at me again and started to giggle a bit. Then she said, 'sure! I'd be happy to make one for you.' And made my sandwich. I stood there at the counter waiting and after she put on every piece of my sandwich she would look over at me, as if looking for my approval. It was kinda wierd and I didn't know what was going on really. When she was finished she came over to ring the order up. She asked if I wanted chips and a drink and I said no. She then asked right away if I wanted a pickle. This caught me off guard cause I didn't remember being asked that before. She said there were left over ones from this afternoon. I turned it down politely. As she was ringing me up she looked at my hand (which has the word 'darts' written on it cause I wanted to remind myself to buy darts for work tomorrow.) "DOES YOUR HAND SAY DARTS?!" She says this in a rather shrill tone that kind of startled me because before then we were sort of talking in our 6 inch voices just across the counter. Im not gonna lie, at this point I was a little frightened, cause I couldn't figure out where this could possibly be leading... In a rather timid voice I answered, 'yes. It's just a reminder for me to pick some up tonite.' She then proceeded to tell me that she and her brother play darts periodically and that she loves them and that he made up a rule that if you miss the board all three times you get to go again. In an attempt to be funny and to not display how awkward I was feeling, I came back with ' so does that rule help out you or your brother more?' and she giggled and said she thinks it helps her out more. After she stopped laughing we kind of stood there and looked at each other. So, I started to turn away and said, 'OK, have a good night." As I walked out the door she sort of projected, "OK, I'll talk to you later...". I thought that was a wierd parting word. Then, as I was walking to my car, I sort of put it together that I think she was hitting on me. Or, maybe at least flirting a bit. I smiled, and felt pretty good about the whole situation. So good that I almost turned around and totally just put myself out there by asking her if she would want to do something with me some weekend. Thankfully, I was in the car driving away when I decided that wouldn't have been the worst decision I could have made...

Darts?

On the spur of the moment I decided to run home this weekend. Tracy was coming home from camp for the weekend as well, and my parents are going to be in Europe in the next couple of weeks, so it was gonna be the last chance for a while for the four of us to get together. It was a good weekend, as always. Rained most of the time though.
Work's gonna be busy this week. We're gonna have 150,000 books to put stickers on in a week. I can only imagine how monotonous it's gonna be for these kids to stare at the same book for 8 hours a day for 5 straight days. I gotta think of something entertaining and enjoyable for them. Right now my best idea is darts durring break. If you have any better ideas, let me know.

The Weekend and The All-Star Break

So, I haven't really emailed about this weekend. There's not really a ton to tell cause it was pretty much low key. Saturday night Amy and Darla came down and we went to Mama Carolla's on 54th st. It was sweet action. If I ever have a date again in my life I will go there for dinner cause it was that good. Conversation was interesting. Sunday we finally made it to the 20's class at College Park. It went well. There were about 40 or 50 people in there so it's a good sized crowd. Phil and I talked to the kid who's teaching and he seems to be a really nice guy. The class seems active and we put our emails on the list to let us know what's going on, so hopefully we'll do something social with the group in the not too distant future. Phil found out who 'Abby Moore' from the college class last week is... and believe it or not, I called it, she's going to be a freshman in college next year. HAHAHA! But her real name is Kristen and even though she's pretty young, she still fits in the half plus seven rule, so Phil's still gonna try to meet her sometime (cause she was definately giving him the googly eye for the second week in a row). Sunday Amy helped me pick out some new clothes for work (my first time shopping on my own for that sort of thing i think...). Came out with what seem to be two pretty sharp new polo shirts. So, that was the weekend.

Major League Baseball has reached the All-Star Break. Thus, monday night we watched the Home Run Derby at B-Dub's cause we still don't have cable. Last night Kistler had us over to his house for a feast of fish that he caught on his canada trip. We also watched the All-Star Game on his projector HDTV. Wow.

Im writing at work becuase a couple of things are taking longer to get sent to us than planned, so i've been cleaning the warehouse all morning and listening to some really mellow music which, combined wiht the grey, rainy day, has put me in a pretty solid meloncholy/depressed state (again, I remind everyone that this is not a bad thing, in fact, one of my more worthwhile states of mind, if I do say). So, yeah, it's been low key and that's alright with me.

Phil's Boss

So, the last two days at work we brought in 7 people. Phil was one of them, so yeah, I was his boss. He's an ok worker, i guess... Got a little unruly with throwing pieces of cardboard all over the place, but other than that, I guess I decided I didn't have the heart to fire him before the job was finished. On a more serious note, HE GOT A JOB. The bank, after dragging it's feet for 4 weeks finally figured out that he was good enough to create a position for. So, it was a good day yesterday when we found that out.

Ben & April

It was an enchanting weekend. Probably the best one since we've been to the apartment. Phil's friends Ben & April were down for most of it. What a beautiful couple. I know, I'm a sucker for rigorous conversation, but this weekend was good and that was a big part of it. I think it was so good because I've been so paranoid that I'm never going to get to have those kinds of conversations again now that I'm not in the college setting. Oh, how paranoid I am that my mind will succumb to time and lack of use only to relegate itself to that thing I use only when it's convenient or self serving and basically pointless.

So, we made a wonderful pasta dish, a mexican taco dinner, and a breakfast. Group cooking seemed to be sort of the theme of the meals this weekend. I like the idea cause everyone kind of contributes their little thing or their little nitche. We went to a Hookah bar, which was pretty sweet. The waitress was young, and I think she probably would have wanted to be our friend if we'd asked her. Maybe we'll go back and see what she thinks sometime. Church was interesting. The integration of nationalist sentiment and Christian practice was a topic discussed the night before in a rather harsh light ( I wont jump on the soapbox for this one because of time) and rightfully so. This made church interesting, I said, because this weekend was the 4th of July and there was, of course, the obligatory 'God bless America' sung by everyone in the service. I think all of us rolled our eyes. The sermon was pretty good. We went to the college class on the advice of another friend only to be sadly disappointed. It was pretty much highschool youthgroup continued for all the Heritage kids who attended the church.

Monday was spent going to the Indians baseball game which was great except that I didn't bring my cell phone and missed Amy's call (she was going to the game as well and we planned to meet up to say hey). Well, when we got back I got like 5 messages from her informing me that she was with a group of like 6 women at the game from the 20something's class that we're gonna attend next week and they wanted to meet phil and I. CRAP! That was a perfect opportunity to meet friends wasted because of a stupid cell phone. The game was much fun though, and the fireworks were quite a spectacle. Highlights of the night did not include some old dude sitting behind us yelling for Rowdie, the team mascot, nonstop through the whole game to get his little grandkids to get something signed. Highlights did include some old guy sitting two rows in front of us randomly shouting indiscernible words to the ball players when noone else was talking.

All in all, a very good weekend. Thanks to Ben and April for coming down to hang out. I am pretty sure Phil and I are good hosts, so any of the rest of you yahoos who wanna come chill with us, give us a call.

Friday night

I got up at 4am yesterday to be in a work @ 5. Let me tell you how much fun that was... Oh wait! The good part about that though was that we got up early so we could leave early. My 4th of July weekend started at about 11:15am. Bonus.

I finished Animal Farm and was very satisfied with the book on the whole. Again, I'll probably be referring many who get into Marxism/Socialism/Communism discussions with me to it because it really does highlight the differences subtly. Here's the keeper line:
All animals are equal but some animals are more equal than others.

Spencer came to visit us yesterday night. We went to TGI Friday's to eat and were served by, quite possibly the pushiest waitress I've ever had. We all ordered pop to drink and she proceeded to push us to get something from the bar for like 3 minutes. Attempted to belittle us and mock us and the whole nine yards. Throughout the meal, whenever she came to our table to ask what we needed or whatever, she would put her hand on my back. Ok, here's where we all remember how funny it is that Travis has a bit of a personal space problem... especially with people who are annoying him at the time. Yeah, so that didn't help things at all. Funny story though... There was some kid's birthday at a table near us so all the servers come out and one announces that this girl is turning 16 today. They all sing and the people in the restaurant all clap at the end and cheer and stuff... what does Phil (in all of his impeccable eloquence) yell? 'Two more years till she's legal!'. I think I may have been the only one to hear, and that's a good thing cause I'm sure some girl's dad would have loved to hear that shouted across the room... What a dork. I can't take him anywhere.

Afterwards we drove down to Broadripple and walked around a bit in search of a coffee shop I found on the internet. We found it. It's called the Monon Coffee C0. because it's right off the Monon Trail that runs through there. The coffee was pretty good and the atmosphere pleasant. It may have been a little on the small end, but no matter. Unfortunately this, too, closed at 8pm on weeknights. The harder I try the more I realize that I am going to be relegated to reading my books at the Starbucks down the road because it's taken over everything and is the only thing open late.

Went to see War of the Worlds. It was alright, but kind of weird. I don't really get into the aliens thing to much, and it didn't help that I knew the ending and all from reading the book in middle school I suppose. Phil makes a good point and convinced me that I don't really care for Dakota Fanning (the actress who plays the little girl in the movie) because her lines and dialogue always are so much more intelligent than what she's supposed to be acting like. 10 year olds don't really do sarcasm or dry humor at all. Neither are they really about to out reason their fathers frequently. So there are my not so rave reviews.

I found a hookah bar on the BroadRipple strip and Phil got pretty stoked about that. So much so that I think he wants us to take Ben and April there tonite. We'll see how it goes.