Church 'shopping'

One of the few frustrating things in my life right now is finding a church to attend, often referred to as 'Church shopping'. I can't stand the term mostly because it alludes to a terribly consumeristic approach to church. Just like at the mall, we look for a church with a trendy pastor or where all the cool Christians are going or with a hip website. We can stop by, peruse the isles to see what they're selling and if it fits your style. If so, you can casually associate yourself enough to be cool too. If not, then you can peace out and look for somewhere else. No commitment necessary. Now, I know this could just be semantics. But I can't help but feel like I am doing exactly this. It's extremely frustrating!

At the root of the problem is that I simply cannot figure out what I'm supposed to be looking for. I think before I moved out here I felt confident about what I was looking for in a church. But now, I would be hard pressed to feel confident about any answer I would try to give you. Am I supposed to look for authentic worship? Expository preaching? a thriving congregation? a bunch of people my age? an active community? a comfortable environment? a focus on evangelism? missions? social justice? a place where I feel welcomed? challenged? encouraged? supported? a place where i can use my gifts? where my gifts are needed? Someone tell me just what it is that I'm supposed to be making my church decision on? I think the thing I’ve been looking for the most is preaching that is challenging and full of conviction. Whether this is right or wrong, I don’t know, but what I’m sure about is that none of the teaching I’ve sat under while I’ve been here has been anywhere near what I would call full of conviction. It’s made me wonder whether I should lower my expectations for fear that I’ll look forever without finding it.

At the end of the day, I’m confident that the pastors I’ve heard are disciples of Jesus, that the worship has been an honest offering to God, and that the congregations are likely full of followers of Jesus. Who knows, whether the week I attended each church was actually representative of what the church is or not. Maybe I’ve had a poor approach to my church attendance, which may have affected my ability to feel drawn to that particular body of believers. In no way am I trying to exact any judgment on any of the churches I’ve visited. I’m critiquing to whole process by which I’ve gone about all of this. I’m pretty sure I’ve gone about it all wrong, which is discouraging. Even more discouraging is the sense that if that’s true, then I’ve wasted about 2 months of Sundays trying to find a Church to plant myself in. And I’ve got no idea how I should go about doing things differently.